CIGARETTE BUTTS AND SENSELESS TANGENTIALITIES

09:35pm. I was at my way home last night from work. Since may araw pa at nasa public place naman ako , i felt safe staying at the subway station waiting for my train to come. I sat at one of the benches while listening to my mp3s. Suddenly, may dalawang babae na tumabi sakin. Isang blonde at isang brunette. Naka pang gimik attire sila in mini skirts and stockings. Saturday night, so I guess galing sila sa isang party or inuman. I paid no extra attention.

Then things started to get weird. Tumayo yung brunette at humarap sakin. Sabay nagsayaw ng pang agogo dancer (napaka 80's na term nito)sa harap ko. For real, I don't know how to react. I just felt na mainit na yung mukha ko at tenga ko. These increased vasodilation ay galing sa halo halong pagkapahiya, pagkatawa, at takot. Then tumayo yung blonde at nakisayaw din. Parang mga tanga, sabay akong sinayawan. They continued to dance as if naka ecstasy sila,  grinding lower and lower.. Kung lalagyan ko ng music yung sayaw nila, perfect yung "Spaghetting Pababa" ng Sexbomb. I felt na nasa isang strip show ako.

Oh please not in this public subway station.

When the train arrived, I stood up, natatawa at alam ko na halos lahat ng tao eh nakatingin sakin at dun sa dalawang bebot na yon. Tumayo ako sa pinto ng train waited for it to go to a complete stop.

Little did I know na nakasunod pala yung 2 girls sa akin at nasa likod ko.

Oh shit.

When I pressed the button sa pinto ng train para mag bukas ito, sumabay na pumindot yung isang girl sa akin so as nagkadampi yung kamay namen. Nagulat ako  and when I turned around to look at her, she just gave me a sleazy smile. I smiled back, and then boarded the train.

I sat myself and hoped na sa malayo sila uupo.

But No.

Mukang ayaw nila akong tantanan. They sat exactly in front of me. Magkaharap. I pretended na I don't give a thing so I continued to listen to my mp3s.

The blondie began talking to me.

She asked questions in English to me. I answered in Norwegian. Akala ba niya, hindi ako marunong mag Norsk? Gulat yung isang babae. Then she said to the other girl: " Du kan snakke med han på Norsk. Han forstår vårt språk" (You can talk with him in Norwegian. He can understand our langguage).

The rest of our conversation is in Norsk. Grabe yung pagkalasing ni ate. Mejo gumugulapay sya. Literal. Mabait naman pala sila. Lasing nga lang kaya sobrang wild. Inalok pako ni blondie ng beer na hawak nya, but I just said "Nei, takk. Jeg drikker ikke" (no thanks. I don't drink). Svensk sina ate. Tinanong nila ako kung nakakaintindi ako ng Swedish, and I said yes, since Norsk and Svensk are very much alike.

I felt relief when tumayo sila. Then they alighted the train at Nationaltheatret Station. Before the doors of the train closed, they both turned to look at me and gave me their last seductive wink. Then nagtawanan sila at lumakad palayo.

Natawa na lang din ako... mag isa. Ang gwapo mo talaga Ron!